"Sorry I’m late, but it’s done me no favours either. I’ve been 30 minutes in traffic when I should have been making money, I can only put £4 on the clock for a call out, see."
This is what cab drivers in London say when they turn up a half hour late. It's verbal gymnastics of the highest calibre. A quick Cockney-fuck-you with the "I'm sorry, but" then straight into the complaint, a backfilp, now the blame's on you, a perfect dismount and suddenly you're the one that feels bad.
This fucking place man. I'm sorry, but...
Clive_W
I can kill a man with my bare hands.
playstion-playa
Apart from Thailand I haven't been with a girl. And I'm not 100% she was a girl.
De-frag44
I can make you happy. I know about computers
Da-shiznit112
If you looked in my bag you'd find: Cologne, my wallet, some chewing gum, children's shoes, roofies, oh and some sunglasses.
Oxford_grad1999
When I was at Oxford, my Oxford chums said I was the wittiest Oxford Student at Oxford
Hot_cross_buns99
Don't let the diabetes fool you, I'm as fit as a thirty nine year old
Lactose_free09
I've not got much upper body strength so you might need to go on top for a bit
Lad_99
If you like cheese, you'll love me.
Time_bandit24/5
If you spent an hour with me: It'd make the other 22 all worthwhile.
Grandmaster2012
I'm like Kasparov's Opening Gambit. Beautiful, but deadly
the_angel_of_death49
You'll like it with me because: I won't make a sound. I won't even move if you don't want me to
Dr-giggles
Fill in the blanks. "Holding hands" is sexy, "A serious discussion on megapixels" is sexier.
Clayton
Jazz is my first love, but there's more than enough of me to go around
Jeremy19
I'm confident you'll be satisfied. I've measured myself.
Pubboy916
I am looking for a lion tamer because I am an animal.
Da-strain22
I can offer you my love and all the money I have in the bank
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